what a keeper looks like
How it used to be
we will work through this since i haven’t stopped loving him yet. Still insecure about when he goes on his other fb i can’t help but think he’s talking to her or vice versa and if so about what?
Is this it?
Have i found my soul-mate or someone who gives me emotional whiplash? Why must i be reprimanded every time i say anything? You never want to take pictures together… should you not exist in my memory, for our children if we have any? You asked me once how many children i wanted.. i wonder if you’re playing games with me… if I’m just the substitute till what you really want comes along.
i feel we were friendlier at first, you put actual effort without refrains or complaints, or maybe i just made that up cause at the time you were perfect. now your always moody, i feel like i make you moody so lately staying away seems to be the only way i stay in a better mood. Talking about being fair and double standards whys it you take every thing you feel out on me. in fact when i start getting upset or take offence to how your acting i get told to not be a grump and it’s this weird little mental cycle where I’m feeling really messed with. i just wanna give you; you’re space, even if it’s killing me inside cause i just wanna be around you, but not if being with you sometimes is going to be a downer.
I’m starting to not converse as much cause since you don’t reply as much as I’d like i don’t know what we really talk about.. what do we even have in common anymore? do you even want to know me? I’ve asked about your life and you growing up but i don’t feel like you actually care. i don’t know if you actually do, you show it in small doses but it’s never consistant and i try so hard to keep being happy but every time he tells me he loves me I’m not sure if he’s telling me the truth or adding fillers. don’t know if he’s cheating on me, but he quotes how little i text him but all our texts are me talking and him responding in rawr… didn’t know i was dating a dinosaur? everything upsets him, or maybe everything i do… i just don’t feel like he likes me and if that’s the case i wish hed just buck up and tell me…it hurts to think my dream come true isn’t his and to feel so held down by the weight of the negativity i feel within our relationship… i try so hard to stay positive but it never pays off. i don’t know how else to talk to him, or express myself when i get shut down left right and centre… i hope we can work things out before it’s too late… i just wish there was something i knew… </3